You know that moment when your phone lights up and your stomach drops… because you already know it’s about the thing you worked so hard to fix?

That was me.

I had already made the calls. Confirmed the schedules. Coordinated two separate venues. Real people. Real time slots. Real humans waiting because I said, “Yes, confirmed na.”

I moved things around in my own day to make sure it all aligned. I did the follow-ups. I double-checked the details. I sent the messages. I got the “Okay, see you then. Thank you ma'am.”

DONE.... Then my phone buzzed.

“Let’s just change it.”

“I got busy.”

“I forgot to give instructions.”

And just like that… everything tilted.

Have you ever felt that quiet heat rise up your spine? Not explosive anger. Not shouting. Just that slow realization that something you carefully arranged is now being casually rearranged by someone else.

And here’s the thing... This wasn’t a client. Not work. Not a stranger.

This was my mom!!!

She asked me to make the arrangements. I did. To the letter. (And I'm paying for all this... not figuratively but literally, to the last centavo.)

What I wanted, so simply, was to hear this:

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll sort this out myself.”

That’s it.

Because if I’ve already executed what was requested, and you decide to pivot, then the pivot belongs to you. Not me.

What hurt wasn’t even the change. It was the automatic assumption that I would now also manage the fallout.

Call the operators again. Explain the changes. Re-adjust the timing. Smooth everything over. As if my part didn’t already end at “arranged as instructed.” And she already cancelled ONCE, this was the 2nd time already.

Filipino moms have PhDs in “last-minute changes” and honorary degrees in “bahala na.” I love her. Deeply. But love does not cancel logistics.

Again, what stung wasn’t the change. It really was the expectation that I would now also manage the consequences of a decision I didn’t make.

I already did my part. Now I have to undo it too? Unsa man gyud???

This is where adulthood gets interesting. Because the younger version of me would’ve gone full on bat-sh*t dramatic. Okay, maybe I raised my voice a notch. But I still chose the win.

The win wasn’t controlling the situation.

The win wasn’t proving I was right.

The win was calmly saying, “I already arranged everything as requested. If there are changes, please handle the adjustments yourself.” Okay, maybe it wasn't that calm because it was in a Cebuano version/tone that's mixed with the Waraynon mood. But the point is, I'm not going to do anything anymore. Hard stop.

Because here’s the bigger lesson that also shows up in work, friendships, and life in general:

Doing what was asked of you does not automatically sign you up to absorb someone else’s lack of planning.

We can be helpful. We can be efficient. We can be dependable. But we are not the cleanup crew for decisions we didn’t make.

Sometimes being the bigger person doesn’t mean fixing it. It means stepping back and letting the right person own it.

That’s today’s #WINSday energy:

Not winning the argument. Not winning control.

Winning self-control.

Protect your time, your effort, and your peace.

Because progress over perfection also applies to boundaries.

And showing up doesn’t mean signing up for everything.

You know that feeling when your soul hasn’t fully docked back into your body yet? Murag naa pa kos laing planeta. Weh? So, I just woke up from a nap before my shift and for a solid 47 seconds I had no idea what year it was, what day it was, or what dimension I was currently operating in.

So... I'm turning 42. Or maybe I already did? Honestly, I’ve stopped counting. Not because I’m avoiding my age like an overdue bill, but because time feels like that one coworker who’s always around but you never really talk to. Anyway—Aries. Born under the fire sign that apparently means I’m passionate, driven, and just a bit dramatic (but in a charming way, okay?). Basically, I’m the type who’ll plan an entire new life direction at 3AM then forget about it by sunrise because I got distracted by a new productivity app.

Last year, I picked up running. For health? Yes. For sanity? Definitely. For the thrill of watching my bank account cry every time I see a new pair of running shoes? Also yes. Is it helping me lose weight? That depends—are we talking physically, emotionally, or financially?

Now, let’s talk about hormones. Or maybe not. These hormones are out here cosplaying as emotional terrorists—messing with my sleep, my weight, my skin, my sanity. It's like puberty threw a boomerang and it came back, just angrier and more chaotic. As a night owl, sleep and I are basically in a situationship. I want it. It avoids me. When we do meet, it’s intense and short-lived. On my worst days, I feel like a zombie who accidentally wandered into a productivity seminar and decided to stay.

Also, let’s address the elephant in the brain—undiagnosed ADHD. High-functioning, they say. Which means I function… while also forgetting where I put my phone, why I opened the fridge, (or why is my phone inside the fridge???) and how I ended up watching a documentary about ancient plumbing systems during my break.

This morning, Le husband NoodleBoy—bless his unintentionally savage soul—asked me, “So, are you running a 42K tomorrow for your birthday?” LUUUHH! Patya nalang ko! Me, looking like a panda with 2 hours of sleep and a mental load heavier than my laundry basket, was just... Sir, right now, I can barely run my life. Would it be iconic? Yes. Would I survive? Maybe. Would I finish in under 7 hours? Debatable. But honestly, I’m in that season where self-preservation is the real flex. I don’t need to prove anything to anyone—except maybe my past self, who thought she’d have life figured out by 30. (She was cute.)

Truth is, I sometimes lay awake staring at the ceiling, wondering:  What have I been doing with my life so far? Am I making a mark or just circling the same routine until I run out of ink? I feel like I’m in the middle of a midlife plot twist, where I’m both the main character and the unreliable narrator. Do I continue this path? Or veer off to the road less traveled where there's a cottage, a garden, and maybe slightly more sleep?

And yet... despite the chaos, the anxiety, and the lingering feeling that I’ve been winging it since 2004—I feel hopeful. Like rain on your wedding day or free food when you're already full. Not what you expected, but somehow... still kind of perfect?

So here I am. Forty-two. Sleep-deprived, hormone-ravaged, emotionally bruised, but spiritually scrappy. Anxious but excited. Unprepared but lowkey confident. I’m not who I thought I’d be—but I think I’m starting to like who I actually am. Padayon lang ta sa gibati. Even if the feelings are loud and messy, and a little sweaty from that last run... or indoor cycling.

Now that I'm in my 40s, I think aging isn’t just about getting older anymore. I feel like it’s about growing into a more confident and empowered version of ourselves. Since I started visiting Infinity Aesthetic Center in Ormoc in January 2024, I’ve learned that preserving our youth goes beyond what we see in the mirror. It’s about feeling good in our skin, letting go of insecurities, and finding strength in taking care of ourselves.

When I began my treatments at Infinity Aesthetic Center, I wasn’t just looking for a quick fix for my skin. At that time, my skin was really breaking out bad due to my hormones, and it was right after the holidays when I ate so much sweets and carbs that it was really wreaking havoc on my skin. I wanted to look good again, if not better. 

I told the aestheticians that I wanted to have Korean skin or glass skin. It was a long shot I know but we started treating my acne with some creams and a weekly facial, be it a refreshing Hydra Facials or their Signature Facials. Sometimes I'd get the skin-smoothing Carbon Laser Treatments. 

These sessions are more than just about looking good, but honestly, they’re about feeling good. Sounds cliche, right? But it's true! My husband also tells me I deserve to take time for myself, to care for my well-being, and to feel proud of who I am.

We’re often told by society that we need to look a certain way to be valuable. But for me, these treatments aren’t about fitting into someone else’s mold. They’re about taking charge of how I feel about myself. They allow me to look in the mirror and see not just a woman in her 40s, but a strong, confident person who can handle anything that comes her way.

People should know that youth isn’t just about having smooth skin or fewer wrinkles but more like the confidence that comes from feeling good about yourself. After each visit to Infinity Aesthetic Center, I walk out with more than just glowing skin. I walk out with a boost in confidence. This feeling isn’t about vanity. Instead, it's about shedding insecurities that can hold us back. It’s about stepping into the world with the mindset that I’m ready for whatever life throws at me.

When we take care of ourselves, we build confidence, and that confidence affects everything we do. I’ve noticed that I carry myself differently, speak more assertively, and approach challenges with a new sense of capability. Feeling good about how we look helps us focus on what really matters—living our lives to the fullest without worrying about how we appear to others.

Aging with grace also means accepting who we are at every stage of life. It’s about appreciating the lines that tell our story, the experiences that have shaped us, and the wisdom that comes with age. Getting beauty treatments like RF (radiofrequency) or HIFU (high-intensity focused ultrasound) not only makes us look younger, but they help us feel comfortable and confident in our own skin, no matter our age.

When we accept ourselves, we feel empowered. We don’t need to change or hide who we are to be valuable—we’re already enough just as we are. Honestly, these treatments can highlight our natural beauty and help us feel strong and ready to face the world.

Preserving our youth isn’t a goal to reach, but it should be an ongoing process of taking care of ourselves and finding what makes us feel good. Let’s take care of our skin, our minds, and our hearts. Let’s build confidence that helps us tackle anything life throws at us. 

Aging with grace isn’t just about looking young, but it’s about feeling strong, confident, and completely at peace with who we are.